WHO SAID IT?

''I feel like smacking you in the face, mate, stay away from me.''

A. Queen Elizabeth
B. Julian Barnes
C. Martin Amis, to Julian Barnes
D. Pete Doherty
E. All of the above, at one time or another

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LATEST CONTRIBUTIONS

FROM TOMORROWKNOWS: (common atrocities)

School big pleads guilty in sex sting

A Manhattan high school administrator who bragged about sexual liaisons with teenagers was nabbed trying to hook up with more underage girls in an Internet sting operation, authorities said yesterday.

Steven Mark Rubinstein, 49, an assistant principal at Murry Bergtraum High School, pleaded guilty to kiddie porn and child enticement charges in White Plains Federal Court.

School officials reassigned Rubinstein last month after learning of the allegations and will move to fire him, a Department of Education spokeswoman said.

Using the handle "DaddyMark," Rubinstein sent sexually explicit messages from his home and school computers to federal agents posing as 13-year-olds over the past year, prosecutors said.

Rubinstein, who lives in Poughkeepsie, claimed in the cyberchats that he'd had sex with 15-year-old and 17-year-old girls in the past. After trading messages with the undercover officers, he requested a meeting so he could addthem to his list of conquests. When confronted, Rubinstein admitted trying to meet the "girls" but shied away from an actual rendezvous when he became suspicious that he was dealing with officers.

A teacher since 1985, Rubinstein also admitted downloading and trading images of child pornography over the Internet. Authorities said they seized images of minors having sex withadults from his computer. Rubinstein faces a mandatory minimum of five years in prison when he is sentenced July 10.

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FROM SPORTSQUOTES: (this one came to me in a dream)

--"I went to a Billy Joel concert at the Staples Center on Wednesday. Billy Joel was rockin'. I went with my family and had a great time. I'm a huge fan. We were all waiting for "Piano Man." It was his last song. He saved the best for last."

Excerpt from Matt Leinart's diary
Read the rest of the the installment here.

FROM EXPERTSSAY: (there's one born every minute)

U.S. Bird Flu Threat May Be Overstated, Experts Say

Dr. Marc Siegel, author of False Alarm: The Truth About the Epidemic of Fear and a clinical associate professor of medicine at New York University School of Medicine in New York City,said, "There's a complete psychosis here."

"The whole problem with the topic is the blurring of the distinction between birds and people. I'd be worried if I was a bird -- maybe. But not even all birds should be worried," Siegel said.

FROM INSIDEDISNEY: (q's and a's that shed light on the great entertainment giant)

Q: With 2 deaths in less than year, Epcot's Mission: Space is becoming quite notorious. Is it true that going on this attraction is more dangerous than actually going to outer space?

A: Absolutely not. The space shuttle has a death rate of 2%. Mission: Space's 2 deaths over the last year are statistically insignificant. Taking into account ride capacity and Epcot's average attendance, I put the number of Mission: Space "missions" at around 500,000 a year. You do the math.

Q: Thanks for putting my mind at ease. Now I know that it is much to go on a theme park ride than to be blasted into space.

A: Glad to be of service.